there are some decisions in life that are REALLY hard to make, they're the decisions that could potentially change your life for better, or for worse. I had to make one today, it was REALLY big... I had to decide if i wanted to break up with my boyfriend... and i did, I had been feeling like something wasn't quite right. and I know that no relationship is perfect, but something wasn't right and i didn't feel very safe. and I kinda missed the freedom of being single. my friends are prolly mad at me and they're allowed to be. I was gonna wait a little longer until I was gonna break up with him.. but it was painful, like i thought i was gonna be sick each time he looked at me because i knew he loved me and I just couldn't love him back. not the way he did. but there were boundaries crossed, i never verbalized them, but how can you say "you're loving me too much, can you stop?" it's weird.. you know? but the relationship was too... close i guess is the word i'm looking for. it felt like we were joined at the hip a lot. and if you know me in real life you'd know how independent i am and that i need space. I'm not used to having to hold someone's hand (not literally) all the time, I'm not used to having to basically take care of something that seems so delicate that it'll break... it's hard... really hard....
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