To a friend:

Honestly?  Sometimes I feel like you ignore my existance. Am I annoying? Am I embarassing? Am I weird?  Sometimes I just want it all to stop, I feel like Ive given so much but get nothing back. Ever. Sometimes I just dont want to care anymore. But I cant. Every once in a while you see me, or respond to me.  I realize how nice it is to talk to someone. Even though you have some terrible shit going on, you still want to know how Im doing. In a world of completely self-centered people, that means a lot to me. I try not to care, but I cant stop. So Ive learned to go it alone But these periods of silence leave me feeling abandoned. Ive never felt so lonely in my entire life. And I thought you were someone I could coumt on. I trusted you. I feel betrayed Lonely Abandoned. I try to reach out to you I thought you would umderstand what Im going through. You know what its like to feel alone I thought we were friends. I feel so mad Sad Confused. I text you once every few days To see if you want to talk To show you I still care. Have you ever started a conversation with me? Do you even care? Do I matter to you at all? Or am I annoying? Am i just a bug, buzzing around? Thats how I feel. I feel so mixed up with emotions, but most of all, Im sad Extremely sad So sad that I could break And just start to cry. Maybe this isnt about you. I dont know what its about exactly.. But maybe you were the last straw Now Im completely alone With no ones company but my own. I hate it.